i knew it would not last

break na ulit kami.















ngayon nyo lang nalaman? ayos lang yan. ako rin, kailan ko lang nabalitaan na hindi na kami.


kamusta naman ako? ayos naman. so far, di naman ako katulad nung last time na every night tinatapos ang dasal sa iyak. and everything. na super pathetic. haha at please, utang na loob, tulad ng sabi ko sa huli kong post, ayokong umabot sa ganoon.


sabi ni Jorge, di ko raw tanggap. di naman sa ganoon. shocked lng tlga ko na di ko man lang alam na break na pala kami. aba, akalain mong ipakilala akong "ex?!" nagtanong pa kung sasabihin ba namin. XD natawa lang din naman ako. ikaw ba di ka ma-shock malaman mo break na kayo ng ka-relasyon mo samantalang ayaw mo pa naman talaga pero tanggap mo naman na dun na kayo hahantong?


so anyway. ayun. lahat naman tayo, nakita na parating din dun anytime soon. salamat sa lahat ng sumuporta and all. haha ilang buwan din yun. di ko actually masyado na-feel, tapos nagsawa na ulit. kasi may gusto na ulit sa iba. hahaha okay, medyo nakakasakit na. so tama na muna. ayaw kong maging bitter. or rather, ayaw kong ilabas na bitter ako deep inside. mapupunta na naman ako sa pathetic stage nyan e. and that's just so... pathetic.

isa siguro sa malaking factor bakit di ako pathetic ay dahil sa nag-uusap naman kami. di tulad ng ibang style (tulad nung ginamit nya last year) na di kami nagpapansinan. e wala naman akong galit sa kanya. wala nga ba? ewan. pero ang kapal nya kung may galit sya sken. hahaha joke. ayun. kasi, di na kami magkikita next sem. o. ayun. wala lang. pero naiimagine ko nga minsan e, pag lunch tapos sa LB ako kakain tas makikita ko syang may kasamang iba. ouch. haha wag muna. bahala na. hanap na lang din ako ng ibang machchever. yung gwapo at maputi. xD hahaha kahit ano na lang. basta gusto ko talaga magaling sa math at kwela kausap, yung di ako mabobore. at yung dead air moments ay di lumalagpas ng two second. hala, naglista daw ba? XD





Anyway, I'm taking summer classes. Again. I was planning to take six units - a GE (must be MST) and BA 99.2. Which I failed last semester. Which meant that I had to shift out of BAA. One of the reasons I'm not (as) pathetic about our break-up. I already have so many problems, I can't help but face most of them with a smile. If he can't support me as a boyfriend, I hope he'll try to support me as a friend. boo.


And it's quite a very boring summer. I don't know why. It's so unlike the summer last year. When we would go to McDo and spend four hours doing nothing but talking - about almost everything. We could even see some of the buses already at the other lane (meaning, nakaikot na sila sa next terminal spot nila). I don't know. Summer classes are already near the end, (eleven meetings left) and nothing much happens. It's very routinary. And if you've read (even a part of) Sophie's World, you might have come across that part where Sophie sees that her mother's very used to the routines of life she's quite a routine herself. And that's. Just. Eew. I wouldn't want that. I don't like that, ever since.


Though, there seems to be something new coming. We might go to Negros Oriental (my father's homeland) for the wake and burial of my Aunty Rosie. I'm not really close to her, well, not to any of the Cuecos and Gimonys, but of course, that's the least we could do for her. She died of cancer. I hate cancer. And I'm afraid of it. About going to Negros, I'm really not quite sure if I could go. I have an exam on Monday, and FOR SOME STUPID REASON I have two recorded absences in Bio 1, when in fact I was only absent ONCE! T-T So I can't actually risk absenting myself. I don't want to absent either. I actually enjoy Ma'am Amparado's presence. hahaha

But I really want a vacation. It will be a very big help.